[et_pb_section fb_built=”1″ theme_builder_area=”post_content” _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” custom_padding=”0px|||||”][et_pb_row _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_column _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” type=”4_4″ theme_builder_area=”post_content”][et_pb_text _builder_version=”4.27.4″ _module_preset=”default” theme_builder_area=”post_content” hover_enabled=”0″ sticky_enabled=”0″]
If I had to choose one movie that represents the nostalgia-laden age we live in, “Anaconda” would be a pretty good fit. A film so basic in its messaging and yet, as described by my father as he walked out the theater, “hard to watch”. This is coming from a man who loves “Nothing but Trouble.”
“Anaconda,” directed by Tom Gormican, stars Jack Black as Doug, Paul Rudd as Griff, Steve Zahn as Kenny, and Thandiwe Newton as Claire. The movie, as described by Wikipedia, is a meta remake of the 1997 “Anaconda” movie. It is truly beyond any genre definition as it is action adventure, comedy, and horror all at the same time.
The film primarily revolves around Doug and Griff, who as children aspired to make movies. But now as adults, Griff is a failed TV actor serving mainly as an extra, while Doug films wedding videos. Griff meets up with Doug to celebrate Doug’s birthday and proposes that they remake “Anaconda,” with Griff having bought the rights to it. Kenny and Claire join in, but Doug is skeptical until he rewatches an old film they made as kids. They fly out to Brazil and meet up with Carlos, played by Selton Mello, who is a snake handler, and serves as possibly the only point of enjoyment in the film.
Meanwhile concurring with the main plot, a woman named Anna, played by Daniela Melchior, is on the run, and claims the boat that the crew was going to use is her father’s. They end up all agreeing to go together, and they film a majority of the movie all before Griff accidentally kills the snake by throwing it into the river, causing it to be chopped up by the boat’s propeller. Carlos, mourning the loss of his pet, goes out into the jungle at night. The crew goes looking for him only to find he has been eaten by an actual giant anaconda, and thus, they must escape.
The movie is trying to do a lot- even more than what I have described. The plot feels so disjointed and deeply incoherent at times. Another problem is the chemistry between the actors, which is essentially non-existent. None of the emotions feel real, and the movie doesn’t know what it wants to be. It’s not particularly scary, it’s not at all funny, but it does have some decent action bits. The only thing going for the film is its premise, but even then, this is only used as nostalgia to draw fans of the franchise in. You get a cameo from famed rapper and star of “War of the Worlds” (2025) Ice Cube, but it barely lasts.
This film will make no one happy. Fans of the original will not enjoy it due to its only minor use of the original characters. People who have never watched the old movies will dislike it, because it’s not at all unique or interesting. Overall, “Anaconda” is yet another remake attempting to cash into nostalgia. I give the movie a 3.2/10.
[/et_pb_text][/et_pb_column][/et_pb_row][/et_pb_section]
psucollegio 